I’ve been horrible about keeping this thing up to date…

July 22, 2013 in Lymphoma by Jeffry Reed

So not much has been going on. I don’t remember being so sick the first time I had the Methotrexate dose as I did this time. I was actually throwing up in the hospital, first time even with two type of anti nausea meds.

When I got home, it took over 6 days to recover….basically you feel like shit. It’s not a nice way to say it but it’s more honest then saying crap.

Walking to the bathroom is a gargantuan effort, because it feels like somebody drop-kicked you in the bowels. It friggen hurts. To make things worse, it takes major pain medicine like Oxycontin to overcome that but then it constipates the hell out of you so three days of that is …well…..

You sleep a lot. I mean non stop. You don’t want to get on the internet, you don’t want to talk on the phone, you don’t even want to talk. The sores in my mouth this time were pretty big and I had a huge blood blister on the side on my mouth. I don’t remember biting it but dang. My tongue even hurts….and I’m turning into a lizard. My skin is dry as death valley sand and flaking off. Mostly on my head and face. I’m like WTF?  Chemo sucks.

Screw cancer with a barbed-wire wrapped baseball bat.  I know the Methotrexate is killing the cancer but I’m really dreading two more doses of it. 1800mg is too much. It’s 200mg then 1600…..and I have 2 more of this course.  I know I have to do all 8 doses but I gotta say, if this stuff builds up over time and gets worse, dang.

It’s been 10 days and I still run out of breath walking around the little bit I do. I tried to walk upstairs and ran out of breath, walk to the mailbox and back, out of breath. I’ll be so happy when I feel good again. I’m am sick and tired of being sick and having no energy. I feel like a prisoner and it’s just making me lash out and get mad.

I guess that’s a good thing because I need to stay fighting mad. I seriously want to take this cancer out to the gun range and smoke it’s ass with some hollow points. I just want to get to remission and stay there. I’m so afraid it’s going to return and I have not even gotten to the remission part.

I can’t fix anything because they don’t know what caused it…..so anyhow… I know people wanted an update. I wish I had more to share but basically I’ve been sleeping. Exciting huh?